pedestrians=krill

Riding  a bicycle in a big city that has no respect for cyclists is always a bit intense, especially so when you’re always late, like me.  You have to ride too fast and take the occasional “risk”.  What doesn’t help at all is that the events taking place on city streets is like a food chain of physics and hate, a Mandela wheel of mutual distaste.

Bus drivers hate everyone because…well…just because.  It’s a part of a bus driver’s entrance exam that he/she be as unhelpful, surly and hateful as possible, to pretend not to hear questions about stops ahead, to grumble a reluctant response when a persistent passenger keeps nagging for an answer, to pop the clutch or brake suddenly when the old and infirm are just standing up or boarding, to start driving off while passengers are still exiting, and to glare in those big mirrors they have at anyone who dares smile or carry on a friendly conversation.  They hold everyone in disdain (even their passengers) and they can because they’re behind the wheel of the biggest, heaviest, deadliest rectangles on wheels the world has ever seen.
Taxi drivers hate bus drivers because they are natural enemies: buses take their potential passengers and worse, both have to disgorge their occupants on the right-hand side of the road, making for utter chaos and lot’s of middle fingers, honking,  various lewd thrusting gestures and swear words.  They hold everyone else in disdain, too, but have great false smiles and amazingly whack-job political theories they’ll share with you free of charge during your ride.
Private car owners hate buses and taxis because they impede their ability to drive at 100 miles an hour between stoplights,  are notorious for scraping off their precious side mirrors (usually while said private car is illegally parked in bus and taxi loading zones)  and bus exhaust in particular dims the recently polished paintjobs of their sainted vehicles.  They hold everyone else in disdain, as well, because let’s face it…only poor people take buses and only wimps take taxis.
Motorcyclists hate private cars, taxis and buses because they all make it difficult to do 200 mph and wheelies between stoplights, and more importantly, buses and taxis and cars have a dangerous blind-spot mentality when it comes motorcycles and cut them off at every opportunity. The resulting introduction of skin to asphalt is rather unpleasant.  They, too, have nothing but disdain for everyone because it’s obvious that no one else shares their unique dexterity and driving skills, and only idiots wouldn’t want to straddle a rolling babe magnet every day.
Cyclists hate motorcycles because they’re always trying to do bicycle-esque maneuvers while doing 200mph, and brush by them with only centimeters to spare for no apparent reason, they hate private cars because of the incessant honking and self-important dagger glares thrown at them through tinted windows, they hate taxis because they are the most erratic drivers on the road, as if guided by random muscle spasms, and they hate buses because they are huge, loud, obnoxious, disrespectful of human life, and spew appalling clouds of smoke into every cyclists face.  Cyclists hold pretty much everyone in disdain because only lazy bastards and capitalist pigs don’t ride bikes.
And pedestrians, well, they’re just envious, and nervous…it’s obvious they don’t have any change for the bus, can’t afford a taxi ride, can only dream of owning a car, would have to work too hard to buy a motorcycle and are afraid of biking in the city.  And they are soft and squishy.  They are the krill of the vehicular food chain.  And sadly, buses are the great whites.